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Listening is it a Learned act?

By: Curtis Reddehase

There are so many relationships that could benefit from a really good listener. Whether we are considering a personal relationship or a business relationship listening can really make it or break it. Here are some techniques that can be applied to the art of listening that could prove to help expand business relationships or strengthen a relationship with the most important person in your life. First of all focusing on the speaker in a conversation can make a world of difference. Make a conscious effort to listen and look directly at the person speaking. Focus on the speaker. Do not just act like you are listening; really process what they are saying. Controlling your urge to speak before they are finished this will help the thoughts of the speaker to be complete. Also this will prevent any assumptions by the listener that are not accurate and will help the communication go smoothly. At the appropriate time give visual and a verbal feedback, make eye contact with the speaker and show by your physical behavior that you are listening, such as a nodding of your head if you agree. Another important part of listening is understanding what the speaker is talking about. This is one of the most important aspects of listening. If what you are hearing is not understandable to you then your communication is handicapped and will remain so until you begin to understand what the speaker is trying to convey to you. When this happens, try not to judge or jump to conclusions even if those conclusions are favorable ones. If at some point you feel that you disagree with what a person is saying, listen first and evaluate or debate the points to which you do not see eye to eye on. By handling the disagreement this way, you and the person you are listening to will have a more fruitful outcome, even if you still disagree. Clarity is another great aspect of listening. If you are unclear on something a speaker has said, ask them to clarify. Mirror back what was said; this might resolve any question the speaker has as to why you do not understand this particular point. Mirror back by restating in your own words the speaker’s message. For example “So what you are saying is…..”. Remembering someone’s name can be one of the hardest things about listening. You are introduced to someone & their name is stated but then 2 seconds later your mind is blank regarding their name. One solution to this is to create an association between the persons name & something that is very familiar to you. Repeat their name in your mind several times while looking at them and listening to what they are talking about. If possible write down something to help you remember at a later time. Listening is not a passive activity. It requires mental effort, unfortunately it is rarely taught in schools. So you have got to learn how to listen another way and that usually means missing out on many opportunities until you get it down.

Article Source: http://www.articleresourceindex.com

The author manages a company that sells Austin Real Estate.

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